Episode 5.6
Written by Phil Ford
Produced by David Crean
Directed by AJ Quinn
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Hollamby is still the house-guest of Neil and Di, but not for much longer if Neil has anything to do with it. Just how long is he expected to keep up the charade that he and Di are a normal married couple? In the meantime, knowing that Neil will never agree to father a child, Di comes up with a plan to get pregnant without his consent; she gets in contact with Tony, his boyfriend and pays him to act as sperm collector.
Phyl and Bev’s plans for the motorised wheelchair are approved by PR hungry Neil. After Phyl’s list of supplies is requisitioned, work begins and progresses quickly. This is despite the fact that Phyl and Bev are stealing a number of the parts to build a proper reflux still in the greenhouse. Life is good for the Costa Cons, but there is a cause for concern when Colin discovers the drugs stash hidden behind their mirror and helps himself. They question Yvonne about the theft, but she knows nothing.
Yvonne realises that life in Larkhall is unlikely to improve when the prison is privatised, not just because of staffing cuts and security cameras in the showers, but also because she knows that Bostock’s golden-boy, Fenner, is favourite to take over as G-Wing’s Governor. Karen tips Yvonne off that celebrity Christopher Biggins has been invited to Larkhall to receive the motorised wheelchair on behalf of the charity. It doesn’t take long for Yvonne to understand the real meaning behind Karen’s message: the presentation is the idea forum for a protest.
Yvonne is confused by Colin’s attitude towards her, but soon twigs that he and Fenner are planning on planting something nasty in her cell. As the other inmates head off to work, Yvonne feigns a migraine and goes back to her cell, planning to lie in wait and catch him at it. Sure enough, Colin sneaks through the door, but realises that he’s bitten off more than he can chew when Yvonne makes a grab for his arm and rolls up his sleeve to reveal his track-marks. Later, Colin thanks Yvonne for not shopping him. She assures him that her decision was in no way altruistic.
Snowball is continuing to play the victim whenever Neil is around, never missing a chance to bemoan the fact that she misses Ritchie dreadfully and doesn’t know how long she can go on without him. When Yvonne informs Snowball that Ritchie’s paralysis is permanent, Snowball goes straight to Neil and turns on the waterworks. The last thing that Neil needs is a suicide on his hands so reluctantly, he grants Snowball and Ritchie a closed visit.
Neil doesn’t know how longer he’ll be able to stand living with Hollamby and, in desperation, he arranges for her to be given a flat in the PO’s accommodation. He also sings her praises to Bostock and convinces him to take her on when Linford take over. Meanwhile, Di continues to receive regular deliveries from Tony and sets about trying to impregnate herself. However, the plan is forced to stop when Hollamby moves out. All Di can do is buy a pregnancy testing kit and pray for the little blue line.
Read the factsheet written by the Centre for Crime and Justice Studies to accompany this episode:
Episode 6 - Charity Work in Prison